How To Make My Partner Feel Loved: You are every reason, every hope, every dream I have ever had and no matter what happens to us in the future, every day we are together is the greatest day of my life. So, it’s not going to be easy, it’s going to be really hard. And we’re going to have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you; I want all of you, forever.” – Noah, ‘The Notebook’.
Choosing the same person over and over again means focusing every day on the positive impact and gifts that your partner brings on into your life that you could be grateful for. This could be: his/her laughter, beauty, sensuality, playfulness, companionship, loyalty, intentions, intellect, manners, humor, or enthusiasm but sometimes love can be exhausting, repetitive, unexciting, and lacking warmth.
Have you ever felt like love is so complicated, but you can’t explain exactly why? It is as if no matter what you do, the stars don’t seem to align in your favor and cupid is in hibernation. It is easier to just shake your head and find a friend who can empathize with you without having to go into the details of why it’s so hard out there.
But once you begin to pay attention, you understand quickly enough that there are a few factors that make love so darn hard and even harder to keep loving your partner after you choose them. For instance, if you ever met someone who would have been a perfect match for you five years from now, or ten years ago, you know that feeling that time plays a very big factor.
Perhaps they are still building their business and don’t feel secure enough to enter into a relationship. They could be changing careers and need enough time to concentrate on their new path. Perhaps they are still immature and need a good ten years of solid self-development to get to the point where you already are. It could also be a past relationship trauma that makes it near impossible for them to trust or to believe in love. They couldn’t keep up with you if they tried, and you don’t have ten years to wait around until they’re ready.
Blaming the demise of a relationship (or its failure to begin altogether) on timing seems like a lazy excuse, but more often than not, two people are somewhat similar to two ships passing each other at the sea in night. Meeting an amazing person in the worst of times sucks. It’s not the only reason relationships fail to get off the ground, but it’s definitely a big one.
We should always remember that falling in love is facing uncertainty head-on. It’s facing uncertainty over having your feelings reciprocated, over being fully accepted by your partner, and celebrated for who you are.
Discovering that your partner is everything that you ever dreamt of and more, can be an exciting journey, but it’s also a leap into the unknown; because a few months or a few years into the relationship and you discover that your partner is no longer the fire that turns you into gold. Everything seems boring. The laughter feels forced, and the conversations are now way too long for you.
The uncertainty of whether or not you made the right choice in being with your partner can feed anxiety, especially if you’re not equipped to handle it well. It can do a number on you, messing with your emotions and your ability to discern up from down. If you’re not careful, it can make you impatient, and insecure, and it can cause you to sabotage (subconsciously) even the best relationships.
I feel that this is where open communication and transparency are most needed. One of the most common pieces of advice on building a solid relationship is to make sure to communicate, but communicating effectively takes more effort and practice than most people think. You both have to lay it all on the table without fear or favor and figure out what the genesis of the issue or issues really is.
Humans are capable of language and self-expression, but our meanings often get lost in the space between what we say and how we’re interpreted. Insecurities and traumas get in the way of expressing ourselves fully. Prejudices and biases get in the way of how we understand the person trying to tell us something.
Important information gets stuck in our throats. We yell out the wrong thing because we’re nervous and can’t think straight. Pride prevents us from taking back words we didn’t mean, or from expressing in detail how we really feel. Bad communication destroys love before it can even begin to blossom into something beautiful and long-term.
There is quite a large difference between being with someone and actually choosing them. It’s easy to be with someone. Easy to get caught up in the excitement that comes with a new relationship and develop feelings for someone. It’s fun to lose yourself in the honeymoon phase of falling for someone and all of the passion that comes along with it.
The part that isn’t so easy comes when things get hard and being with someone becomes more of a challenge. At this point, you have to fight in order for your relationship to work and if you ever want to feel love and passion again. It isn’t the walk in the park it was when you first met and things can quickly spiral out of control if two people decide only to just ‘be’ together.
I know that everybody expresses their love and admiration differently therefore stay true to who you are, but also find new ways how To Make My Partner Feel Loved This works for me:
Check Below How To Make My Partner Feel Loved
- Physical touch: Holding hands, kissing, cuddling, making love, long hugs.
- Paying attention to little things and not just important things like birthdays and wedding anniversaries.
- Little things like remembering to text and say – Honey, you are going to do amazing in your interview! Because you actually remembered or helped your partner garden even though you would rather watch football instead.
- Listening without interruption. This is actually listening to understand what your partner is saying and not just listening in order to give a response.
- Positive criticism builds your partner. Say it with a lot of love otherwise it comes off as condescending.
- Spending more quality time learning new things together like exotic recipes, taking a pottery class, hiking…
- Positive affirmations like how beautiful or handsome they look or congratulating them on their latest achievements however small they may seem to you.
- Acts of service like giving away to charity together or participating in charity events.
Love is no easy task but again, nothing great ever is. The good news is, that when you find someone who is willing to put in the effort and do the work, love can become easier than you ever thought it could be. When the timing is right and the willingness is there, your relationship can thrive.
Do not give up looking for that one person who makes it easier. Finding them will make all the hardship and trouble worth the effort.
A friend once said that we don’t have to think about happily ever after and forever with the person we think ‘Is the one. All we must do is look for the one for today and simply choose them every day. It is not a magical thing or a poetic affair. It is about wanting to work it out each and every time.
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